Old Git's Funnies: Funnies for Bank Holiday Monday

Monday 26 August 2024

Funnies for Bank Holiday Monday

Dear Family and Friends, Today was sunny but again a tiresome wind was blowing. I walked to the beach and had a chat with an old friend, and later did my exercises. Now with help from my loyal friends, I have made a collection of the best of the best fun stuff out there today!

And I thought that hanging had been abolished!

Thanks Knud!

Glam Rock - enthusiastically performed!

Not what it seems!

Thanks John!

Patience is a virtue!

Thanks again John!

Absolutely - why take chances!

Thanks Kay!

Hmm! - Mathematics not your strong point?

Thanks again Knud!

Looking up!

Thanks Robert!

Oh! Yes!!!

Thanks again Robert!

The next six are from Stuart

Thanks Stuart!

Tee hee!

Ooh! Lorraine!

Ducks having a laugh!

Regarding Lightbulbs!

2 Great Nations divided by a single language!???

The Parrot!

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary. Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. In desperation, John threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior." John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, when the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?"

You may live to regret that!